The Pen and the Prod: Original Hot and Steamy Burger Jokes

Original Hot and Steamy Burger Jokes

A cheeseburger walks into a bar and sits down next to a stunningly beautiful young woman. He says, “Can I buy you a drink?” Foxy lady turns, leans close, and in her most seductive voice says, “Can I pour ketchup all over you, pick you up by your buns with both hands, and swallow you whole?” The cheeseburger…

  • Stands up, shocked, and says, “I’m very sorry, Miss, but I’m looking for more than a one-night burger stand!”
  • Winks and says, “Congratulations, baby. You just created the world’s first half-pound Happy Meal.”
  • Recognizes the woman’s sad vulnerability, the likelihood that she’d missed out on strong parental guidance, and the chances that other burgers had mistreated her—all leading to a low self-esteem and a reckless attitude toward casual dining. He brushes her cheek softly with the edge of his top bun and says, “No thank you, dear, but if you would ever like to get together and just talk—about life, hopes, dreams—look me up in the menu.”
  • Winks and says, “Consider me super-sized.”